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December 18, 2006

Bet I can't have just one...

A few years ago, I thought I might have a sex addiction problem. Not that I was necessarily addicted to sex, but just that I was (somewhat) compulsively promiscuous. (I was going through a short "mental hypochrondriac" phase in which I thought I had lots of conditions. Apparently promiscuity is one of the symptoms of bipolar disorder, as well as "inappropriate punning", which I am also quite passionate about).

I eventually came to my senses and realized that my "promiscuity" was a. not nearly as bad as actual sex addicts, b. not caused by a psychological disorder, and c. not actually anything I cared to change. I've realized that the only problem I have is poor impulse control.

Today someone brought us a box of cookies at work. If I didn't have coworkers, I think I would have eaten the entire box. (It was a big box with multi-layers of cookies). Actually, the fact that I have coworkers was not what kept me from eating the entire box, but rather the fact that they were there and would know. There is a reason that I do not buy large boxes of cookies to keep in my home. I wouldn't be able to keep them, I'd eat the entire box right away. I am guilty of overindulgence.

I don't drink that often, but when I do I almost always have one drink too many. I don't get to the point where I'm falling down and blacking out (er, not anymore at least) but I do think I lack that switch in my brain that tells me when to stop. (I can tell when I'm already drunk, at which point I do stop... but I just can't seem to quit when I'm ahead).

I am the same way with men. I overindulge and have no will power. Combine that with my low standards, lack of morals, tendency to become easily infatuated, and aforementioned drinking problem... you know what you get. I've managed to get it under control lately, but I still know that there is something in me that has a tendency to overdo it. I always feel like I'm just a few steps away from an all night bender with a cute boy, a case of beer, and a bag of Doritos.

Oh man, that's like the sexiest thing I've ever thought of. Seriously. I'm that pathetic.

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