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February 25, 2007

Reunited... and it feels so.... bad?

Someone I went to high school with called me recently about our 10-year Reunion. (Yes, I realize I am giving away my age right now).

I honestly, have no desire to "reunite" with anyone I went to high school with. The only people I care to be in touch with... I'm already in touch with. Everyone else... let's just say we lost touch for a reason.

I didn't love high school. I wasn't a cheerleader or Class President or Valedictorian or Prom Queen (although I was nominated for Homecoming Queen one year, but that's because we cheated - that's a whole other story). I didn't hate high school either. I had friends and I got okay grades and I pretty much survived in one piece.

That doesn't mean I want to go back and reminisce.

I have fond memories of my high school friends, but that's pretty much all we have. Most of them are not in the same place that I am in. We have each grown in different directions. (I don't think that history is enough of a reason to stay friends. Not to say that I'm on bad terms with all of them... I just don't care to be on any terms with most of them).

I am kind of curious to see who has gotten fat or bald... to see who is unemployed or divorced. But I have no desire to "catch up". There are a few people I do keep in touch with from high school - people who are (kind of) in the same place I am now... people who live locally that I run into at bars/events... guys I've had casual sex with over the past 10 years... people who try to add me on myspace.

Not too long ago I ran into a girl from high school in the ladies room of a local bar I frequent. She seemed really happy to see me, which was completely fake since I have it on good account that she's said terrible things about me behind my back. I can't stand the girl and didn't feel like pretending to chat with her, so when she went into the stall, I ran out of the bathroom - and out of the bar altogether - just to avoid having to continue talking to her.

Even more recently I had a close encounter with an ex-friend. Although I suppose "encounter" isn't really the right word for it, since we didn't actually speak. I was chatting with another girl (about the upcoming reunion actually) and the ex-friend came over and stood between us with her back to me. It was the funniest thing ever - I couldn't even be offended because I was too amused by how petty she was being after all these years.

It just reminds me that I don't feel the need to pay to see: A) people I already see and B) people I don't want to see. For those few people that don't fit into category A or B... I'd rather just get together with them (all three or four of them) and save the money.

I decided that sometime between that original phone call - damn me for not having an unlisted phone number - and the actual event I will dig out (and dust off) my old high school yearbook. After the initial horror/laughter that comes from viewing your high school yearbook photo ten years later, I've decided that I have to find ten or more people that I'd actually like to see (that I'm not already in touch with) and no more than twenty people that I really really really dread ever seeing again.

The cost of attending the event must be appropriate based on the amount of people attending that I do and don't want to see. I refuse to spend a ton of money to hang out with a bunch of people I'd normally pay not to have to see. I'm willing to spend a maximum of $6 per person I'd like to see (about the cost of me just buying them an imported beer at the local bar). On the other hand, I'm not willing to spend more than $2 per person I don't want to see (the approximate cost of two rolls of single-ply toilet paper that I could use to TP their houses).

In honor of high school, I've devised a mathematical formula to decide whether or not I shall attend:
X= number of people I'd like to see
X>10
Y= number of people I don't want to see
Y<20
Z= cost of attending the event

N= amount of pounds I have to lose before the reunion

Z/2Y=6X-N

Conclusions:

1. This formula is meaningless. I made it up based on little-to-no mathematical knowledge. (It's been ten years since high school! You think I remember math?)

2. I really need to go on a diet/join a gym before I even consider "reuniting" with anyone.

3. I think I'll stay home.

1 comment:

amanda said...

Argh...my 10-year is coming up the summer after next, and there is already a MySpace group dedicated to the showstopper production that the class leaders are planning it to be.

I'm in the same boat, and not really wanting to go...the five or six people that I really cared about in high school are all still really close.

However, my close girlfriends and I decided that the night of, we'll be attending, renting a limo (something we never had the money to do in high school), get dressed up (even though one of the potential locations for the event is a barn--if that gives you any insight into the sort of community that I grew up in), then having a sleepover at one of our homes afterwards for discussion purposes.

We're planning on making it our *own* special night, outsiders be damned.

Maybe you could do the same?