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July 10, 2008

Dumb Things John McCain Doesn't Say

Please enjoy this short clip of the man who could be our next president addressing, or rather failing to address, the ever popular question of why some insurance companies cover Viagra but not birth control and whether that practice is fair.

[Please also enjoy the MSNBC caption for this video, "McCain keeps stiff upper lip during Viagra question". Ah, journalism.]

We really feel that this video entirely speaks for itself, but we know that some people won't be able to watch the video, so we're going to post the transcript below and if we're going to do that, we might as well get a little commentary in.

Q: Earlier this week Carly Fiorina was meeting with a bunch of reporters and talked about it being unfair that insurance companies cover Viagra but not birth control. And -

McCain: I certainly do not want to discuss that issue. (uneasy laughter)

No problem, Senator McCain. All of us young women who are registered voters and care about health and equality and fairness and other junk like that, we totally don't want to talk about it either. You don't have to tell us how you feel about it if you don't want to. It's cool.
Q: But apparently you’ve voted against (McCain laughter continues)

McCain: I don’t know what I voted -

Q: Voted against coverage of birth control, forcing health insurance companies to cover birth control in the past. Is that still your position?

McCain: I’ll look at my voting record on it, but I have, uh, (5 second pause), I don’t recall the vote right now. But I’ll be glad to look at it and get back to you as to why, I don’t -

You'll look at it and get back to us? Oh, thanks so much, Senator. Of course, you could just tell us how you feel about the issue, because even if you don't remember the specific vote you must know what your position is now, correct? And your position now must be the same as it was then, because everyone knows that politicians don't ever change their views unless they're one of those damn dirty flip-floppers. But, you know, if you want to get back to us that's fine. We don't want to put you out.

Q: I guess her statement was that it was unfair that health insurance companies cover Viagra but not birth control. Do you have an opinion on that?

McCain: (after 8 second pause) I don’t know enough about it to give you an informed answer because I don’t recall the vote, I’ve cast thousands of votes in the Senate. I will respond to - it’s a, it’s a (nervous)

Well, you knew enough about the issue to vote on it before, but now you're so uninformed that you can't even make any kind of statement about it at all? You're practically acting like you don't know what birth control or Viagra are, and all due respect and everything, but we all know that's not the case. Listen, we're aware that women having access to affordable birth control is an issue that appears exactly nowhere on the McCain Master List of Priorities and Goals. But if you're hoping to try to avoid the question entirely right up to the election, can you please at least come up with a smoother non-answer? Those awkward pauses are just painful.

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