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September 19, 2008

The ESC's Guide to Election-Season Drinking

Yeah, so we're all a little depressed about this whole Sarah Palin thing. And if she and Senator Maverick McSuckage, actually make it to the White House, we can expect even more ill feelings. The ESC is prone to drowning our sorrows with alcohol and we know a lot of our readers feel the same way, so before we write anything else... we'd just like to take a moment to advise everyone to DRINK RESPONSIBLY!

We figured we'd start our guide off with a list of awesome gifts each other in order to help survive the election season. We found some swank looking gift baskets from GiftTree.com including some wine baskets (like the "Compassionate Collection" sympathy basket or the "Champagne & Chocolate" celebratory basket - you know, depending on what happens and how you feel about it).

Of course, there's also paraphernalia, such as a "Community Organizers" beer stein, a set of "Lipstick? Still Not Voting For Her" coasters, Bill Clinton corkscrew... or even just a shot glass that shows off one of our favorite constitutional rights...

In case you want to get a little creative with your cocktails...

Or take a different angle and try to be a little classier... (The ESC isn't exactly the classiest group of ladies out there -shocker! - but we really want to learn to become a little more proper before Rock of Love: Charm School starts).

I wonder if they address that whole Creationism/Evolution issue in The Wine Bible? I know that if McCain/Palin messes with the separation of church state, I'm going to want to partake of the "blood of Christ" with something like this:

"Wine Retreat" gift basket from gifttree.com

We already invented the Rudy Giuliani drinking game during the primaries... but we're sure the candidates will give us plenty of ammunition for a new game. Maybe take a shot every time someone mentions "change" or "lipstick" or "maverick". Or just replace your standard dart board with one of these terrifying John McCain stand-ups:

John McCain

And I don't know... maybe we found our Halloween costumes for this year...

We're either going as that or... this?

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