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June 9, 2009

Four ways to catch a cheating spouse?

A blogger friend of ours emailed us today to ask if we had ever heard of ArticleAlley.com and if we ever use sites like that. (It's one of those free content sites - people can take free articles for use on their sites, and you can also submit articles of your own.) We hadn't and we don't, so we went to check it out. There's a huge variety of stuff on there, but one piece towards the top of the homepage caught my eye. It's about what to do when you suspect that your spouse is cheating on you, and since it is from a free content site I'm just going to treat you to the whole thing, plus my comments.

Four ways to catch a cheating spouse
Copyright (c) 2009 Ed Opperman

It can be heart wrenching to even think that your spouse may be seeing somebody else. Arguably, for some people -- the uncertainty and doubt that they feel can almost be worse than the discovery of the truth itself. So, if your gut is telling you that your husband, or wife, is seeing somebody else, probably the best thing that you can do is try and figure out if your feelings are justified, or if you're just being paranoid.
I'd say that whether it's really the "best thing that you can do" depends on exactly how you go about trying to figure it out. Let's just say that I'm not entirely on board with Ed's suggestions.
Here are four things you can do to help you catch a cheating spouse:

Make an unexpected stop while they are at work - You have errands to do -- you're dropping the kids off somewhere, you're out doing a bit of shopping, or you're just out and about. If you happen to be passing by his or her place of work, and it's not too out of place for you to stop by and see them -- this could be a good way to catch your spouse cheating.
I see (at least) two issues with this. First, if it's "not too out of place" for you to randomly drop in and visit your spouse at work, that probably means they know better than to do anything inappropriate at a time when you might show up. And second, what exactly are you hoping to catch them doing at their workplace in the middle of the day? Making out in the supply closet?
Have a trusted friend follow them - If you have a trusted friend, especially a lifelong friend who isn't mutual, you may be able to have him or her follow your spouse. However, this option is only viable if you have a good idea of when your spouse may be leaving to see another person -- you shouldn't ask a friend to trail your spouse all the time. This may strain your friendship, and potentially worse -- your spouse may catch on if they continually see the same vehicle day in and day out.
This one is hilarious. He's basically suggesting that you try to turn a friend into an amateur private investigator (if you want to be charitable) or stalker (if you don't). This sounds like the plot of a goofy sitcom or a Lifetime movie. I'm not sure I have any friends who would go along with a scheme like this, although I guess that's why he specifies the "lifelong friend who isn't mutual", because you need that specific type of friend who likes you enough to consider going along with this or even listen to the suggestion without pointing out how irrational and paranoid you're acting, while also not really caring enough about your spouse to bother pointing out to you that your plan isn't exactly the healthiest way to deal with your feelings. But it is nice of Ed to specify that you don't have to make your friend quit their job and abandon their own family in order to keep your spouse under constant surveillance.
Retrieve deleted data from their cell phone - Many people nowadays have at least one cell phone, and there are many in that group who maintain several cell phone accounts for any number of reasons. If your spouse owns a cell phone, and they are cheating on you, there's a good chance that they have used their cell phone during the course of their affair.

As with most technologies, pricing drops for certain products and services over time, and cell-phone data retrieval isn't any different. Today, these services are within the financial reach of most families.

You know what's also often more affordable than you might think and "within the financial reach of most families"? Couples counseling. I'm just saying.
Hire an online investigator - Nowadays, most cheating, and potential cheating, starts on the internet. It's relatively uncommon for a man, or woman, to jump into cheating -- usually there is a pattern of behavior; visiting dating websites, using married-but-dating chat rooms, or even browsing around websites geared toward singles looking to mingle, that precedes the act of cheating. An online investigator can trace your partner's online activity, particularly searching through these types of websites, to help you, and others, catch their cheating spouse -- even if they have not "technically" cheated on you yet.
Oh, so now I have to hire someone? Can't I just ask my trusted "lifelong friend who isn't mutual" to do it for me for free? This is getting way too complicated.
Sometimes, the feelings associated with the "what ifs" of cheating can be worse than dealing with the truth of the situation itself. If you think that your spouse may be cheating on you, you owe it to yourself to find out the truth. By using any of these four methods, you will be able to catch your cheating spouse, or, preferably -- find out that your gut feeling was wrong, and finally be able to put these uneasy feelings to rest.

--Ed Opperman invites you to visit his dating service search website for all of your trace email address needs. He offers internet infidelity investigations , reverse email searches, telephone investigations, and more. To learn how you can catch them cheating online please click here now: ---> http://www.emailrevealer.com

About the Author: ED Opperman is president of Opperman Investigations Inc. He is considered an expert in email tracing and Internet infidelity Investigations. If you need an online investigation or cyber stalking intervention please visit http://www.EmailRevealer.com

Given Mr. Opperman's occupation, it's now suddenly clear why he's chosen these particular methods to suggest, and why he's written several other very similar pieces that appear in the 'Related Articles' suggestions on the site. (I do have to commend his good business sense in offering both online infidelity investigations and cyber stalking interventions. That way maybe both spouses will hire him!) Obviously with free content sites like this you have to be aware of who's writing and why. But I think in this case our mission is clear - somebody needs to write and submit an article about a mature and responsible way to deal with suspicions of infidelity through honesty and open communication. I'd do it myself, but I've got to follow my friend's husband around all day tomorrow so I'm way too busy.


Science Bloggers Association said...

Nice Blog. Congrats.
-Zakir Ali ‘Rajnish’
{ Secretary-TSALIIM & SBAI }

[ Editor- Children’s Poem
& Adult’s Poem ]

Dollface said...

Hilarious commentary. Just for the record, if you guys ever need me to stalk (I mean, keep track of) anyone in the Upstate New York area, I've got ya covered.

Allison said...

What about just calling up that late-night show, Cheaters? :)

Chiquita said...

Haven't you found anything yet? What the hell am I not paying you for? ;)