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August 13, 2009

Quick Hit: Skin-to-Swimsuit Ratio

There are not one but two controversial swimsuit-related news stories right now and they're sort of on opposite sides of the spectrum.

Alton Towers - a theme park in Staffordshire, England - has banned Speedos from their water park. A representative for the park insist that the new rule requiring men to wear swim trunks or boardshorts is meant to "prevent embarrassment among fellow members of the public and to maintain the family-friendly atmosphere at the resort". (This rule applies only to men, but apparently they also frown on thong-wearing of both genders).

Elsewhere in Europe a different kind of bathing suit ban has been enacted. A pool in France recently banned women's use of the "burqini", a head-to-toe swimsuit favored by Muslim women. The new policy bans baggy clothing, including "surfer-style" shorts in favor of figure-hugging suits for "hygiene standards".

So small, tight bathing suits are obscene and big, baggy bathing suits are not hygienic. What is the perfect size and shape of a swimsuit then? What is the perfect ratio of skin to swimsuit? Do you have to show like, 50% skin? 60% skin?

Related: The Olympics: Questions to Ponder


Lisa A. said...

I can't say that that I actually have skin/suit ratio prefernce, but if there are kids around, IMO men in Speedos, or anyone in a thong is a bit too much skin. If it's all adults, I don't care, myself, although some people might find it offensive.

Regarding the burquini (sp?), as a pool owner, I'm calling bullshit on the hygiene issue. Any wet suit sticks to the body, and, er, bodily fluids get into the water, regardless. That's what chlorine is for. Other things, though, like hair and skin cells, get into water also, and can only be removed by periodically draining the pool. So, in that respect, the burquini might actually be more hygienic than a regular suit.

It looks to me like banning the burquini is just another attempt by the French to ban any evidence of Islamic culture and discourage future immigration of Muslims, masked as concern for women's rights.

Condo Blues said...

I have to uphold the English Speedo ban because if you aren't a competitive summer you shouldn't be allowed to wear one period. The good looking guys in them have a hey baby hey I'm a gift to world attitude until they get older and develop a flapple that extends over the Speedo. The most harrowing experience of my life involved a fat old guy in a Speedo in the Dominican Republic. We knew some went topless on the beach - no big. so I'm at the beach and Grandmere decides she wants to sun her self sans tan lines and shows us and the world that she's had a litter of children and boobs that hang to her knees. No big, I say, she's in my husband's siteline not mine as both of us get really interested in our books. Then Grandpere joins his wife from the water, he looks almost naked because his flapple is covering his Speedo. Then he lays down in on his stomach the chair next her that is in my siteline and hikes his Speedo into his butt crack like a thong. I'm seeing a whole lotta flabby old guy that no one should see and hope that no one thinks he beached himself so far from the water and try to pull him back into it. I have nothing but a paperback book with me and cannot use it to gouge out my eyes. My only course of action was to go to the bar and get a drink with the local rum to ease my pain.

ceirdwenfc said...

Condo Blues, you made me laugh. I'm so sorry for the ordeal you went through. I hope the rest of your vacation was better. At least there was rum.

Anonymous said...

Ratio of skin/suit = looks / (weight * age)

Just my opinion...